Since there is already a lot of coverage of this story, I am reposting from other blogs that have already begun discussions around this topic.
According to Waymon Hudson over at the Bilerico Project,
The request to join a new group came through my Facebook page. The group was called “Friends of Bryce“, which could have been anything, but had a note attached that said “Please Help.”
When I clicked over to the group, an all too familiar tale unfolded. Bryce Faulkner, a young gay man from Arkansas, had gone missing after his parents had discovered he was gay. They had gotten into their college-aged son’s email account and discovered messages between Bryce and his boyfriend.
The parents then gave Bryce an ultimatum- enter an extensive and severe “therapy” program or lose all their support for college and living expenses. For a young man from a conservative small town whose entire life, including his job, was tied to his parents, who had nowhere to go and no one to turn to, there really was no choice.
Bryce was sent to 14 week long conversion therapy camp and has not been heard from again.
Peterson Toscano wrote a blog post soon after that compares and contrasts Bryce's story with the similar story of Zach Stark, the young man that was forced into the Love In Action program when he was 16 years old. Zach's story caught national attention and will be shared in the upcoming documentary, "This Is What Love in Action Looks Like."
Peterson hit hard on something that I think is very important
In these cases of ex-gay coercion once someone is no longer a minor, they no longer become pure victims. Although it is difficult and terrifying to resist, if someone is over 18, they can legally say “NO! you cannot make me do this!” and as an adult, they can then live with the consequences. I understand that the financial impact of this can be huge, but not impossible to overcome, especially with the assistance of a boyfriend’s affirming parents and a community committed to taking care of each other (which I know doesn’t always happen.)
I encourage everyone to read Peterson's post, because I think he raises some great points regarding the decisions parents make and the decisions we make regarding the well-being of our lives.
I thought Peterson's post was interesting as well. We really do have the power to say no once we are adults. The consequences of saying no can be very intimidating and trying. It could seem in a lot of these situations to the individual they don't have the power to say no, it is important to be supportive and let them know they can say no.
ReplyDeleteOne thing that was stressed to us when I took Social Psychology is that we as individuals always have the power and the ability to say no.
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