Season's Greetings from California!

I'm in California as I'm writing this blog post. I have finished my first semester as a grad student at Harvard Divinity School. I'm glad to be done and out of the cold for a little bit. As 2010 comes to a close I will reflect on my year and how I've seen the movement grow and not. But that will have to wait until I return from my vacation. In the meantime, enjoy this photo of the blue skies in San Diego. Happy Holidays!!

Queer Youth Speaking Up: Reteaching Gender and Sexuality

Check out this video I came across yesterday. It's been the repost of the day on Facebook by queers and trans folk across the interwebs. Young people in Seattle from the Put This On The Map project put together this fantastic short video. I think it's vitally important that we allow young people to speak for themselves and define their own queerness and their own spaces; as opposed to just telling them, "It Gets Better" — which these young people also critique in this video.

My favorite line: "We need to move past safe spaces ...how about liberating spaces?"

Exodus International Targets Young People for 2011

Despite the substantial scientific, and even theological, evidence that debunks the myth that homosexuality, bisexuality, and gender variance are not embodied ‘disorders’, ex-gay organizations, like Exodus International, have refused to close their doors and rescind their claims that LGBTQ folk are morally flawed and in need of fixing.

Instead, for 2011 Exodus International has refocused their mission and their strategic vision planning has developed into the following manifesto for the upcoming year: Simplify, Amplify, and Intensify.

In an open letter to their supporters, Alan Chambers elaborates on these concepts as they move forward to refocus their mission (simplify), refocus their target audiences (amplify), and refocus the cultural impact their message carries in the world (intensify).

As expected, I have many contentions with Chambers’ message. I find his argument within these categories to be theologically problematic. However, despite my best efforts to disagree with Chambers and Exodus, their organization continues to exist and their message continues to reach the lives of many individuals every day.

Staying connected!

This has been a long overdue post. I wanted to take some time to reintroduce the many ways that folks can get in contact with or even just stay connected with me online. There are several ways to do this:

• Subscribe to my blog via email! This way you won't have to visit my site every day to look for new posts. Instead they'll be delivered directly to your inbox.
• Tweet me! You can follow my Twitter account to read my latest updates, interesting thoughts about events, news, etc. I tweet very often when I'm traveling and at conferences.
• Add me as a friend on Facebook. We all learned from The Social Network, that Facebook really is the one thing online that connects us all to one another.
• Watch and subscribe to my videos on YouTube. Over the past couple of years I have vlogged about my coming out experience, 'ex-gay' experience, and my stint with an exorcism. Check out my channel!
• Say hello! I invite emails and inquiries anytime. You can fill out the contact form by click on the 'Contact' tab, and those messages go directly to my inbox. 

Queer Youth and Religious Debates Over Sexuality

Last month, Harvard Divinity School hosted, "Queer Youth and Religious Debates Over Sexuality," a panel that discussed, as the titled suggests, queer youth in the United States and their relationship to religion and the church. The panel consisted of leading voices on the subject, including Dr. Mark Jordan, a prolific author on the role of homosexuality in American religion.

The video of the event is finally available on the HDS website, but I thought I would repost the video here to facilitate further discussion on the subject of youth, religion, theology, and sexuality.

Video after the jump.

Where's Our Queer Fairy Tale?

Glee, as it does every week, has everyone talking. This past episode definitely had queer folk across the country smiling, yet crying. Feeling joy, while also feeling anguish and anger even. Last night's episode of Glee had Kurt spying on a nearby all-boy private school. While Kurt pretends to go undercover, he meets another gay teenager, and viewers finally see Kurt engaged in the beginnings of a queer romance. The all-boy Glee club performed Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream" and it is definitely the buzz of Tweets and Facebook statuses (video after the jump).

This performance left me smiling, and thinking that this is the beginning our queer fairy tale -- finally available for young queer people struggling to understand their same-sex attractions and/or gender variance. The queering of Katy Perry's song brings me back to the times in my life when I felt attractions and crushes towards other men, but 1) didn't have a language to talk about said feelings; and 2) didn't think it was acceptable to feel that way.

An Indictment Against the Violence and Harm of the 'Ex-Gay' Movement

The Soulforce Symposium on "The Truth About Faith, Love, Science, and Reparative Therapy" created a space for some of the leading voices working on 'ex-gay'-related research and work to come together in hopes exposing the violence and harm produced by the 'ex-gay' movement.

I mentioned yesterday that I had the opportunity to present a paper on the intersectionality panel, titled "Critical Witnessing and Multilingualism: Building the Counter Movement," which is available for download on the Soulforce website.

After the Symposium I took time to reflect on my experiences and to process the information and arguments I heard over the weekend. I wrote an article titled, "An Indictment Against the Violence and Harm of the 'Ex-Gay' Movement," to respond to the Symposium which is available through The Bilerico Project.

As I stress in the article and in my paper, it is crucial that we talk about the violence produced in the 'ex-gay' movement in order to build an inclusive radical counter movement. I hope my words and reflection can help inspire us to get to that point.

Soulforce Symposium: Paper on Building the Counter Movement

Over this past weekend, I had the privilege of attending the Soulforce Symposium on "The Truth About Faith, Love, Science, and Reparative Therapy" as a presenter. I was asked to present a paper on the intersectionality panel on building an inclusive movement centered on intersectional justice. The Symposium was a great time for folks to come together and have deeper conversions through multiple lenses about the violence and harm produced by the 'ex-gay' movement.

Download my paper titled "Critical Witnessing and Multilingualism: Building the Counter Movement" at from the Soulforce website.

It's Time for the Church to Take Responsibility

Yesterday, the Tyra Banks Show re-aired the segment on gay teen exorcisms. The timing for this re-run seems very appropriate given the recent media attention to the high rate of queer-related suicides and violence that affect our young people every day.

In the segment, I share my own personal experiences of wrestling through a spiritual deliverance ministry and overcoming the religious condemnation that misinformed me to believe that I was unworthy of God's full love and grace.

I find the show's reappearance appropriate in this time because with the media spotlight illuminating the violence against queer young people, it is time for the Christian church to take responsibility. Anti-gay religious rhetoric spills out of the pulpit regularly. Pastors tell young queer people that they are inherently disordered and sinful and that they need to change in order to please God. For many, they accept that change is never possible, yet they are dissatisfied with that reality, and cut their lives short. Churches have sat idly by, silent, in this present time as we lament the loss of many lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer individuals—all of whom are loved by God, without reservations.

Four Years Later: National Coming Out Day

Today is National Coming Out Day and exactly 4 years ago, I worked up the courage to, not just come out of the closet, but to come out very publicly as gay to the entire university community at Azusa Pacific University, one of the largest evangelical Christian universities in the United States.

Four years later, yes my life is better, but that is not the message I want to convey to queer individuals that are struggling to break their way out of the closet today.

Talking about Gay-Related Suicides

Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ) individuals have been shaken up and upset by the continuing reports of young people taking their lives because homophobic bullying and an inability to affirm themselves as queer individuals. The reported number of incidents over the past weeks is up to seven, although I am sure the actual number of gay-related suicides is much higher, just unreported. The LGBTQ community is saddened and seemingly shocked by the rising number of reported incidents.

However, this is the continuation of an old trend—just never reported before in this detail. LGBTQ youth have been committing suicide for years. The good aspect of these is that at least they are being reported now. Although, many wonder about what will be done to help queer youth survive adolescence.

Back-to-School Tip of the Year: Identifying the Gay Agenda

Over at Jesus Needs New PR, Matthew Paul Turner posted and criticized a YouTube video that discussed a "useful" Back-to-School tip for parents: identifying the hidden gay agenda in your children's schools. At first I thought the video was a parody or some satirical spoof put together by The Onion. But lo and behold, it was a Focus on the Family supported video. Watch the video after the jump.

The video informs parents on ways to identify the "gay agenda" in their children's schools by looking through the library catalog to find LGBT-affirming books oriented towards a juvenile audience, being aware of diversity trainings, anti-bullying trainings, etc. Basically, their education analyst teaches parents how to censor multiculturalism and diversity from their children.

"Breaking the Chains" Documentary

A year ago, three American Evangelical leaders traveled to Uganda for a conference on “the gay agenda” to speak about "alternatives" to homosexuality; in other words, to falsely teach that homosexuality is "curable" human condition.

The Anti-Homosexuality Bill was proposed just a few months later in Uganda and introduced some of the harshest punishments in the world for homosexuals. The Bill calls for lifetime imprisonment of all LGBT people, death to homosexuals who are HIV-positive and prison for any Ugandan who fails to report LGBT Ugandans within 24 hours of the Bill passing.

Despite the security risks, Ugandan activists are raising the alarm about this human rights abuse. Recent Northwestern University graduate Alyssa Eisenstein traveled to Uganda this past spring to hear from these inspiring men and women. With interviews from LGBT activists, legal and political authorities, university students, village leaders and even a traditional healer, "Breaking the Chains" profiles these activists as they tell this story in their own words.


Watch the documentary after the jump.

Are you REALLY a Christian?

President Obama's identity as a Christian has really been called into question. With his support for the building of a Muslim cultural center near Ground Zero, 1 in 5 Americans believe that Obama is actually a Muslim, and not a Christian. Whether he be a Muslim, Christian, Sikh, or even an atheist altogether doesn't really matter to me. But basically, America is waiting for Obama to prove that he is indeed really a Christian. Welcome to my world, Mr. President!

Standing Up to NOM in St. Louis

Church of the Holy Hipsters and Gays

The September 2010 issue of Details Magazine has hit the stands with a Zac Efron cover that little gay boys all of the country are drooling over. Past the cover is a feature article titled "The New Face of Faith," that highlights an up-and-coming church in the Los Angeles: Reality LA. What sets Reality apart from other churches is its young, modern, hipster congregation, which also attracts some of Hollywood's young celebrities, including Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus, and Joe Jonas.

In addition to the young Los Angeles hipster crowd, Reality has also attracted the gays, well the "ex-gays" that is. My perception of Reality after reading this article is that the congregation is full of a bunch of young, healthy, celibate, Hollywood fashionistas, socialistas, homosexuals, etc.

Reclaiming the "F" Word

The other day I was walking through a large crowd on my way to the pharmacy and that’s when I heard it. The one word that makes every little gay boy’s stomach knot and heart stop: “FAGGOT!” The exclamation wasn’t targeted towards me, and I’m unsure if it was it was targeted towards anyone else. With the crowd being so large, I couldn’t find the source of this anti-gay outburst.

But what I want to focus on was my physiological response to hearing someone use this word. My body pretty much entered into a “fight or flight” mode. In a sense, I felt threatened by just hearing the word. This makes me wonder though, can we ever reclaim the term “faggot” as an LGBTQ community?

Reclaiming Our Aspirations

As a child I was always reminded by my teachers that I could grow up to become anything I wanted to be. I really took that to heart as I was growing up. I went through many different phases of wanting to become a lawyer, a doctor, Spanish teacher, veterinarian, Broadway actor, you name it, I probably wanted to be it at some point.

If I were to ask my 8-year-old self, even my 17-year-old self, if I could imagine being where I am today, the answer would be no. Even though I didn’t grow up to become the things I imagined, does that I mean I have to give up on those passions and dreams?

The Queer Question

Justice and equality rang loudly in the state of California yesterday after Judge Walker announced that Proposition 8 was unconstitutional and thus overturned the legislation that defined marriage as being between only one man and one woman.

LGBTQs and their allies celebrated across the country, taking their joy to the streets to proclaim loudly that every person deserves the right to marry. It was a great day, not only to be a California, but definitely a great day to be queer. I definitely celebrated from my new home in Massachusetts, but as a Californian, I was more than excited and proud to be a part of the Golden State.

However the fight for marriage equality is not over. Not even in the state of California. Proponents of the marriage ban already filed an appeal and they will continue to work towards stripping same-sex couples of their right to marry one another. The fact that every Californian now has the right to marry is not good enough for Prop. 8 supporters. Therefore, they have to do whatever they can to ensure that every Californian is not treated equally.

I was taken back when I came to the realization that I stand there and celebrate Judge Walker's decision, but that decision isn't good enough. My right to be treated equally under the law is still threatened. By the mere fact that we are queer, our citizenship is called into question; thus raising "The Queer Question."

Becoming Social Parents

I just returned from visiting my parents and family one last time before I move to Boston at the end of the month. It was an enjoyable visit and we were intentional at making every moment we had together count for something since I'll be moving clear across the United States from them.

Prior to my arrival in Merced, my mother adamantly insisted that we watch the film La Mission during my visit. The film is a drama starring Benjamin Bratt that sheds light on issues of homophobia and sexuality within Chicano families.

As I sat there watching Bratt's character blatantly disown and condemn his son for being gay, I was drawn to my own father's face as he was watching the movie with me. The look of shock, anger, and disappointment covered his face. My partner sat in tears throughout the movie then looked up to my parents and simply said, "Thank you." My coming out experience with my family didn't involve much heartbreak or disowning. My parents were quick to accept me and remind me that they would love me whether I be straight, gay, bi, etc. I am reminded though that not every LGBTQ individual shares the same experience. Films like La Mission become a powerful tool for the LGBTQ community.

Why is religion important?

My friend Brian Gerald wrote a blog post that responded to the ever popular question, "What do you do?," in which he responds with a better question: "What are you doing with your life?" These questions got me to thinking about how often I am asked these very questions when I meet new people, or even when I'm catching up with old friends. When I respond that I work with religious communities and that my research in school is focused on religion, I'm often met with puzzling looks. I am then asked another question: "Why religion?"

Through different cases I end up encountering this question a lot in many different variations such as, Why do people care so much about religion?, Why are people religious?, Why do you talk about religion?, and so on. I am determined then to answer the pressing question, Why is religion important?

Sanctuary Collective 2010 Northeast Regional Conference

UPDATE: Due to various reasons, the Leadership Team of Sanctuary Collective has elected to postpone the 2010 Northeast Regional Conference. For more information please visit the conference page.

Last week I highlighted the Sanctuary Collective in a blog post, and mentioned that they would be hosting a regional conference this summer. The Sanctuary Collective will be hosting a Northeast regional conference in New York City on July 24, 2010.

The Northeast Regional Conference is a gathering of folks who are intrigued by queer organizing in Christian communities. And that means ALL people: LGBTQs and allies. To put it in the Collective's words:

"Whether you are doing organizing yourself, or just want to learn more, we'll have a day full of workshops tailored for you! Come participate in discussions about the ex-gay movement, justice and the Bible, finding YOUR place in this unique and growing movement, and much much more."

I will presenting one (or two) of the workshops at the conference, focusing on the ex-gay movement and race and religion. For more information about registration, workshops, etc., please visit the conference webpage.

Childhood Fairness and the Church

Remember as a child how we were usually fully aware of when something was completely unfair? Whether it be a sibling getting a toy and you didn't, or even a classmate being recognized for an outstanding achievement, but you weren't. In our heads we would tell ourselves, "That's not fair!" This concept childhood fairness is worth a closer examination.

I recently got around to watching the film The Boy in the Striped Pajamas (2008). This film is a Holocaust drama that explores the horror of a concentration (extermination) camp through the eyes of two eight year-old boys, one the son of the camp's Nazi commandant (Bruno), the other a Jewish inmate (Shmuel). Through Bruno's character, the concept of childhood fairness can be closely examined and understood. And by this reading of fairness, I believe we can apply the same reading to the Church.

Telling Our Stories Video

Two weeks ago, I wrote a post that highlighted the importance of storytelling as a form of social protest. The video that follows really demonstrates the point I was trying to make when I say that is important to use our personal experiences as a springboard for critical engagement and social protest.

I tend to enjoy Annual Conference season in the United Methodist Church. It gives us the opportunity to remind ourselves and others of God's never-ending, reconciling love in the Church. The following video was shown at the UMC 2010 California-Pacific Annual Conference this past weekend. The video highlights LGBT United Methodists sharing their stories of how churches have hurt them in the past and how they pray for a reconciled and all-inclusive United Methodist Church. (Video is after the jump.)

Highlighting the Sanctuary Collective

There is an amazing group that has been doing some powerful work, that I am proud to be a part of, and want to share more about. It is rare to find a group of young adults that are so committed to working at the intersections of social justice and religion; yet nevertheless, it is also encouraging when we do find them.

I introduce, Sanctuary Collective, a group of young adults networked together that work to inspire, empower, and support young LGBTQs and allies as they work for justice in Christian communities.

Sanctuary Collective works to train and connect young people with a supportive collective of people that are there to encourage their work, provide them with resources, and so much more. This is truly some exciting work going on here. On their website there are connections to sermons, prayers, bible studies, scriptures, and so much more.

Storytelling as Social Protest

Over the weekend I spoke to graduating LGBTQ (and allies) high schoolers at a Rainbow Graduation Celebration in Riverside, CA. I spoke to the graduates about the importance of sharing their stories and experiences. I drew on my own experiences and how I've used my own story in the work that I do as an advocate for social justice.

I have been having a lot of discussion around this topic of 'storytelling' for quite some time now. I believe that stories are absolutely powerful tools and critically instructive because they challenge and expand our thinking about the world around us. Every individual has a story. Whether those stories be about traumatic experiences, triumphs, achievements, or whatnot, they're stories and they are valuable. Stories have the power to instigate change.

Details on Gay Exorcisms

DETAILS Magazine takes on a sensitive, yet hot topic in their June 2010 issue: gay exorcisms. Matt Mcallester examines the world of reparative therapy and exorcisms in his cultural eye piece titled, "Deliverance: The True Story of a Gay Exorcism". Mcallester focuses on the ritual of exorcism that is often performed as a means of spiritually 'repairing' a person's sexual orientation.

The article is extremely well-written and certainly highlights on the psychological, physical, and spiritual harm caused by exorcism that attempt to rid a person of their homosexuality. In this article I share my own experiences of being haunted by images and reminders of the exorcism I received during my time in reparative therapy.

Headed to Harvard Divinity School

I am graduating (finally) this June from the University of California, Riverside with a B.A. in Religious Studies and I wanted to take the time to personally announce that this fall I will be joining the student body at Harvard Divinity School in Cambridge, MA.

I am very excited about this opportunity. The decisions that went into deciding which graduate school I wanted to attend were very difficult to make, and each school received special consideration.

I am looking forward to the challenges and successes ahead while I'm at student at Harvard. I will be blogging more about my experiences as a queer divinity school student in the near future.

"Christian" Nation in Danger?

I am not sure why, but people still send me annoying chain letter emails; particular those of the "evangelical" variety. Ones that advise me to boycott our currency if they stop printing "In God We Trust" on the currency, or to make sure we protect this "Christian nation" by not letting Congress remove "one nation under God" from the Pledge of Allegiance, and so on. The most recent chain email I received was an argument to prove that the United States is indeed a Christian nation, by listing the preamble to all the state constitutions; they all mention "god" or "almighty god" in their preambles (they really do, look them up).

Linking "ex-gay" therapy and Prop 8

Since the federal trial of Proposition 8 is not be televised or released on YouTube, I am dependent on newspapers and online media outlets to fill me on what is going on in the courtroom. The Los Angeles Times released an article discussing Wednesday's (Jan 20th) events, including a testimony from an "ex-gay" survivor and a highlight of the role of religion in the Prop. 8 campaign.

The article did not, however, make the link I would have liked to seen between "ex-gay" therapy and issues of religious-sanctioned discrimination, as seen in the Prop. 8 campaign. I would like to make these comparisons based on my experiences as an "ex-gay" survivor and an individual with a history (and present) of experiencing religious-sanctioned discrimination.

Quake in Haiti an Act of Godly Love?

As the Haitians struggle through the ruins of cities after a tragic natural disaster, the famed American televangelist, Pat Robertson, makes the claim that perhaps this tragic earthquake is a "blessing in disguise." He blames the quake on the Haitians' "pact with the devil" two centuries ago while seeking liberation from the French.

It is almost astonishing that anyone would believe that an instant event that leads destruction of communities and the loss of lives would be an act of God. Furthermore, it raises the question: why are the victims the one to be blamed?

I want to be upset with Robertson, but I have to ask myself first, what is it that leads to his conviction that a violent and tragic event (albeit, yes, caused by nature) is an act of God's love? The real question here is about violence and love.

Can the two be used in the same sentence? If God is love, then perhaps we need to look at what love is to understand the nature of God.

To borrow from the Christian text of 1 Corinthians 13, "Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (NRSV). Furthermore, we learn from Romans 13:10, that love does no harm.

It is difficult to imagine then that God would wipe out people on the basis of love, when it contradicts the very idea that love is about kindness and doesn't do harm to ones neighbor. Perhaps Pat Robertson needs to check his convictions regarding love.

The Image of a Scout

A recent letter to the editor in the LA Times responded to an op-ed piece by Charles Fleming (a former Scout, current professor at USC) that criticized the Boy Scouts of America and its continued discrimination against gays.

The writer of the letter (Howard Lockwood) expressed his resentment towards Fleming's article, saying that, "It appears he [Fleming] became politically liberal and ashamed of being an Eagle Scout [...] Fleming and the ACLU want to kill Scouting unless it conforms to their liberal views."

It appears that Lockwood wants to preserve the traditional, conservative nature of the organization. He references several prominent past scouts that appear to epitomize the image of scouting.

Lockwood believes that "Scouting builds character and responsibility and develops personal fitness. Any boy would be lucky to be in Scouting, and now more than ever its positive influence is needed."

It is difficult to see how one's sexual orientation could inhibit them from building their character and responsibility and developing their fitness through Scouting. If Lockwood truly stands behind his claims, shouldn't "any boy" truly mean "any boy," regardless of their sexual orientation?

It is understandable that Lockwood wants to preserve the traditional, historic image of Scouting, and apparently manhood, that he hold so closely to his personal life and heart, but does it necessarily have to be a postwar, uncritically bourgeois and stridently heterosexist image? Perhaps Lockwood needs to re-imagine what it means to be a Scout.